Monday, July 25, 2005
ummmm..caught this blog entry by
someone whom i do not know
i'm touched by his story..
silly ain't i?
but... he's really very devoted towards his ex
i do hope he'll find the right girl
yes, we need to move on with our life..
but we cant possibly forget our first love
sweet, bitter or sour it is.... (spicy?)
i strongly feel that it's v memorable to me......
.
.
25/7/2005 - Lost Love
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Last nite, a msg came through to me and i feel the heaviness of my heart. then i realised tat i've always hold her dear and close to my heart. every time i received a msg from her, i'll think of the times we spent together - Sentosa, clubbing, trip to Genting, watching soccer, shopping, supper, movies, reading books lying next to each other, slack at home... 2yrs of our lives. Funny how we always have the selective memories and remember the happy times, and forget the stuff which upsets us then after a long time...
And every time, the image of her leaving my house tat fateful day will juz appear in my mind. where i know tat we're gng nowhere and i finally decided to let her go, let her go in search of her happiness. It was at tat particular moment where all i want is her finding her happiness. I never thot i'll think tat way until tat moment.
And another 2yrs plus have gone by. All it takes is a simple greeting from her, a simple "hello, how are you?" every now and then as a fren, to get me thinkin abt us again. I know tat both of us have changed after we part. At least, i know i've changed a lot.
That phase of my life is one of my best. She is always there for me - providing companionship, advice, emotional support, and most importantly love. I feel balanced then. after she left, i was lost. for the longest time, i was constantly searching for myself, lost. i tried and look for love, but all in the wrong places. i treated gals wrong as well. i admit, i've broke a few hearts in the last 2yrs coz i really dunno wat i want anymore.
Recently, i came to terms with issues. I learnt to embrace solitary. i came to realised tat i can be alone without feeling lonely anymore.
Now i know, i juz wanna be single, and left alone. i've always been in denial tat that breakup hurts me deeply and affected me in a way tat i can't explain myself. i simply ignore it and moved on, bring abt a change in me tat i cannot understand myself. i become confused.
I need tat time to heal myself. i need the time and energy to love myself a little more. else, no matter who i'm with, i'll not be happy coz i'll be constantly searching for "her" in the new gal, which will not be fair.
i know i'll always have her in my heart and i'm very glad to know tat she feels the same abt me.
I'm glad she found her happiness. but i can't help missing her whenever her msgs come thru.
Last nite, a msg came through to me and i feel the heaviness of my heart. then i realised tat i've always hold her dear and close to my heart. every time i received a msg from her, i'll think of the times we spent together - Sentosa, clubbing, trip to Genting, watching soccer, shopping, supper, movies, reading books lying next to each other, slack at home... 2yrs of our lives. Funny how we always have the selective memories and remember the happy times, and forget the stuff which upsets us then after a long time...
And every time, the image of her leaving my house tat fateful day will juz appear in my mind. where i know tat we're gng nowhere and i finally decided to let her go, let her go in search of her happiness. It was at tat particular moment where all i want is her finding her happiness. I never thot i'll think tat way until tat moment.
And another 2yrs plus have gone by. All it takes is a simple greeting from her, a simple "hello, how are you?" every now and then as a fren, to get me thinkin abt us again. I know tat both of us have changed after we part. At least, i know i've changed a lot.
That phase of my life is one of my best. She is always there for me - providing companionship, advice, emotional support, and most importantly love. I feel balanced then. after she left, i was lost. for the longest time, i was constantly searching for myself, lost. i tried and look for love, but all in the wrong places. i treated gals wrong as well. i admit, i've broke a few hearts in the last 2yrs coz i really dunno wat i want anymore.
Recently, i came to terms with issues. I learnt to embrace solitary. i came to realised tat i can be alone without feeling lonely anymore.
Now i know, i juz wanna be single, and left alone. i've always been in denial tat that breakup hurts me deeply and affected me in a way tat i can't explain myself. i simply ignore it and moved on, bring abt a change in me tat i cannot understand myself. i become confused.
I need tat time to heal myself. i need the time and energy to love myself a little more. else, no matter who i'm with, i'll not be happy coz i'll be constantly searching for "her" in the new gal, which will not be fair.
i know i'll always have her in my heart and i'm very glad to know tat she feels the same abt me.
I'm glad she found her happiness. but i can't help missing her whenever her msgs come thru.